Saturday, July 30, 2016

an open letter to rhett..

It has been too long since I last wrote. I admit, there have been numerous times I've wanted to sit down and write, more times that you have asked me to. Things have been a constant change, an evolvement from one week to the next but here I am, as I knew I would one day be again, writing to you. Today however, I'm starting something different.. A series of open letters to my son that I'm willing to share with you.


My lucky #3; from the moment I learned of your heart beating, my life changed - your mothers life too. I couldn't have asked for anything as special as you to come along, Lord knows that we are blessed to have you. You smile, laugh, and your life to you is and will continue to be happy. When I look at you all I see is perfection, joy, and Love.

Being blessed with you has to us been the glue that keeps everything together, in line and a bond that our family centers around. We are so thankful to have you.

I will admit, relearning all the ways to teach you what you need to know is a challenge for Daddy. I spend most of my day wondering when you will walk, what you will sound like when you finally talk.. Nervous that you don't eat enough, because you're stubborn like me. I fight constantly with Doctors, insurance companies, specialists and with the different banks to make sure your Mother and I are providing the absolute best resources to help you develop - its a tedious, ongoing battle - but for you I will fight until the day I die to get you all the help you need.

Mommy isn't as concerned with the milestones as I am, of course she is with you all day every day and sees your progress so much closer than I do. Your therapist continues to be amazed at the leaps and bounds you make each time she sees you - and that is reassuring to me. I just want you to know how much I love you. And how scared I am, scared that we could miss something small that will one day be significant to you. Scared that I spend too much time doing all these things to grow you, that I might look back and miss you being our baby. To be honest, I sit and watch you - look at you, play with you, and I already miss you. I miss you because one day you will be grown, you will leave our family home, and be gone.

I love you son. Always remember how important you are to everyone you meet. Your life is significant, you will make a difference.